I don't get the Western Watch joke. I was given a Wostok when I was eight. It was the best watch I ever had until it was stolen. My current one, an automatic Seiko, loses a minute every day, despite regular maintenance.

Workers are waiting at a bus stop near the American Embassy. They watch diplomatic cars arrive -- first a Lada, then a Cadillac. One man nudges another and says, "Wouldn't you like to have one of those for your very own?" The other man replies, "I would surely enjoy owning a Lada." The first man snorts: "The Lada? You certainly don't know anything about automobiles!" "I know my automobiles," replies the second man, "but I don't know you."

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1)A Western reporter gets lost on the streets of East Berlin. He sees two soldiers standing on the corner. He goes up to them and asks in German for directions to his hotel. They say nothing. He reflects that they might be Russian, so he asks in Russian. No response. He realizes that they could be Polish. He has a little Polish, so he tries that. No reply. He figures he might as well ask in English. Still nothing. He walks away. When he's a block away, one soldier turns to the other and says, "That guy was rea ... Читать дальше »

As it was Mao and not Stalin that had the purge against interlectuals a better version of no.4 is...
How many Maoists does it take to change a lightbulb? 3. 1 to hold the ladder,1 to change the bulb and 1 to watch the two dangerous interlectuals

What is the difference between the German Democratic Republic and a theatre? In the theatre there is an emergency exit!

Khrushchev says that both Lenin and Stalin got it all wrong, and t ... Читать дальше »

A. A Russian symphony orchestra after a tour of the West.

Brezhnev was piloting a plane of officials when he ordered them to climb out and hold onto the wings to stabilize the plane. When the plane stabilized he pronounced the fact and all the officials then clapped furiously.

 http://timesonline.typepad.com/comment/2008/06/top-ten-communi.html

(This one is a bit obscure, but any Russian will laugh):
Four Russian violinists have travelled to France for a international violin music festival. While there, one of them had the honor of playing his set on a Stradivarius loaned to him by the hosts. At dinner, he regaled his three travelling companions about his experience with the finest violin he'd ever handled. One of them shrugged, and said "So whats the big deal? It is just a violin?" The others looked at him for a moment, until the first violini ... Читать дальше »

WhatWhat has 200 pair of feet and eats potatoes? The queue outside a Moscow butcher shop. has 200 pair of feet and eats potatoes? The queue outside a Moscow butcher shop.

Reluctantly the communist party had to agree to remove the image of Nicolae Ceauşescu from all the postage stamps in Romania. The reason given was that the stamps kept falling off letters.
Why? Because people were spitting on the wrong side of the stamp.