 Posted by: An American Observer why are communists always getting pulled over?
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 Posted by: john newbery
Great jokes! So easy to update! Just replace old commie leader names with Putin, et al -- voila! Fresh material!
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 У меня сыну полгода. Сказать "в рот мне ноги" он пока не может, зато делает по пять раз на дню.
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 >что-то гугль по запросу "businassman" всякую чушь выдает... <а что должен? >про бизнесменов что-нибудь <так ты и ищи про бизнесменов, а не про человека-с-автобусом-в-заднице!
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 Brezhnev turns up at a camp in deepest Siberia. It is a snap inspection so he requests that everybody turns out on parade. he mounts the platform and starts his address....."Comrade Sailors of the Soviet navy.....".... there is a sharp tug on his arm - he stops and then restarts in exactly the same way. There is another sharp tug and this time a voice says...." Comrade president sailors have stripes that run horizontally - these are vertical....."
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 Gorby and Reagan are stranded on an island and find a bottle. They open it and out comes a genie. He says, "I will give you one item, but I must warn you that you will die on this island". So they both decide they want a newspaper from 15 years in the future. Poof, the paper appears in the sand. Gorby grabs the paper and turns to the financial page and begins laughing and states, "your Reaganomics have plunged the USA into the deepest recession ever!" Reagan grab
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 A KGB officer is walking in the park and he sees and old Jewish man reading a book. The KGB says "What are you reading old man?" The old man says "I am trying to teach myself Hebrew." KGB says "Why are you trying to learn Hebrew? It takes years to get a visa for Israel. You would die before the paperwork got done." "I am learning Hebrew so that when I die and go to Heaven I will be able to speak to Abraham and Moses. Hebrew is the language they speak in Heaven." the old man replies. "But what
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 Moscow in the 1970s. Deepest winter. A rumour spreads through the city that meat will be available for sale the next day at Butcher's Shop no. 1. Tens of thousands turn up on the eve of the event: wrapped up against the cold, carrying stools, vodka, and chessboards, they form an orderly queue.
At 3 am the butcher comes out and says, "Comrades, I've just had a call from the Party Central Committee: it turns out there won't be enough meat for everyone, so the Jews in the queue should go
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Posted by: David 
Another belated offfering:-
Two robotniks in Moscow are working their way along a street, the first one digs a hole on the grass verge and the second one fills it in. Then they walk a bit further on and do the same.
Brezhenev is showing his aged mother around the Kremlin. He shows her his ornate office, the state rooms, the banqueting suite and the garage full of limos. "Well mother has your boy done well?"
An acquaintance who visited the Soviet Union during Lenin's centennial reported that there were signs all over saying, "Lenin lived; Lenin lives; Lenin will live."
This prompted a joke: